The Men’s RoundTable: When You’re In Love With a Beautiful Woman

Everybody loves the supermodels.

What’s the worst thing about men, ladies — The constantly wandering eyes? The not realizing the value of what’s sitting right in front of you just because the waitress has her boobs hanging halfway out and talks with a squeak? The constant divide between how much he says you are the perfect woman for him and all the blonde amazon-built bimbos in his porn collection or the dog-eared pages with the video hoochies in the King magazines he leaves everywhere?

Or is it ALL UH DAT.

There’s a lot of talk about the dangers that the unrealistic standards the media and society hold about what constitutes feminine beauty have on little girls. That when you parade around a certain body shape, or a certain kind of hairstyle, skin tone, or intelligence level as the ideal, that it can lead to self esteem problems for everyone else that doesn’t look like that.

But there’s another side to this — an interesting twist on the whole thing that doesn’t always get discussed, because it’s hard to make it sound legitimately sympathetic …what about the effect that these standards end up having on men?

Men see the same media, if not more that tells them what hot and sexy is supposed to look like. And while no one is going to try to argue that it wasn’t chauvinistic thinking that started all this mess in the first place — one of the interesting side effects for the rest of us is this idea that there are lots of women beautiful women out there, but only so many that seem to fit this slim image of what we’re all supposedly looking for.

Somebody’s dating all these hotties (Hugh Hefner can’t marry all of them at once) — is it really all it’s cracked up to be?

 

Dear RoundTable,

Ok since the boys  have been posting all this mad eye candy in the RT a daily bases, it caused me to ponder a question for the group.

For those of us that have had the pleasure of having a woman super high caliber, did you find yourself going way above and beyond to keep her happy? Did you do this because of the notion that you knew dudes was bombarding on a daily with offers of dicking her down?

At what point if any did you realize that it required too much effort to maintain? My theory has been this over the years, having a super-hot chick like this on your arm is more of a pain in the ass then it’s worth. So while most men will drool and be willing to cut off their left nut to bang a chick like this, very few will be willing to KEEP a chick like this. And thus will settle for a less highly polished chick.

I’m not saying settle for an fugly chick, but just not one that is for highly identifiable walking around with a smangable target on her back.

What say you?
– Good Problems?

We put this question to the OHN men’s roundtable and opened the floor to discussion.  Guys from all across the country offered opinions — and even in some cases shared similar experiences of their own. Here are some of the highlights:

 

When I was a teenager I banged nothing but dimes. But you’re right, they were too much trouble. When I met my wife it was a blind date. My first reaction when I met her was – she’s cute but..  But after getting to know her and realizing that she was a true ride or die chick I had no choice but to let go of that ego and desire to impress other men (after all, why else do we really care what she looks like?). That was 15 years ago, and honestly, not one of the broads I used to fugg with are still “fine” because that’s what time does.

 

 

My wife is very plain. She’s not into fashion or makeup. She refuses to carry a purse. She’s a Vet, so she has no problem dealing with shit (quite literally). But she’s the most honest and genuine person I know, and I love her for it. I’m soooo glad I learned young, because even if my wife isn’t turning heads like some chick from a magazine might, she’s a hell of a wife and a hell of a mother to my children.

 

 

I’ve always said i’d take an average girl with a personality over a dime with nothing else any day. The ones i personally came across were pretty shallow and only good for sex and arm candy — but they weren’t the types to hold me down if it was needed.  Plus they like to be seen just as much as we want them seen. IN the end though it becomes too much work. I have come across a rare few (including one now) who are ride or die and stand for something — and those are the ones you want to have by your side more than anything.

 

 

The hottest woman I have ever dated was the biggest pain in the ass I ever knew (and the worst in bed I ever had). She was just…dumb, to life to everything. As far as I’m concerned my wife is hot as shit and to top it off, intellectually she is the smartest woman I have ever known. She is funny, goofy, low maintenance, and isn’t into that glamour ish much. Hell, I help her with her make-up and do her manicures n shyt. Could I pull a woman prettier? maybe, yeah. Would I ever pull a woman hotter? Never. Sexier? Never. Smarter? Never.

 

I’ve had a couple extremely fine women in my time. In my opinion, if her head is right — I don’t have to be concerned about who’s offering her the dick.  But if her head ain’t right, she’s not worth being concerned about anyway. I’ve been out with my chick, walked away for all of 30 seconds, and returned to see a guy trying to run full game and I don’t trip. I’m the type to sit back and watch with a grin until it’s time for me to step in. I’m really of the opinion that if another man can take her, she wasn’t mine in the first place.

 

 

 

It’s been my experience that a really fine, mature woman with her head on straight knows how to carry herself. If she’s got a good man, she’s not trying to fuck that up for just whoever. As far as doing more to keep her happy…that implies that I would be doing less for a chick who might not look quite as good. I treat ‘em all the same.

Either she’s worth keeping, or she ain’t. If she is, I’m doing everything in my power to keep her happy. There’s no such thing as too much effort for a fantastic woman.

 

I’ve found that since I’ve had my daughter, I’m kinda immune to some of the things that would have other men bending over backwards. It’s like, “I’ve got a little girl. I know this game. Batting the eyelashes and using the cute voice ain’t gettin’ you anywhere with me.”

 

 

 

I think dating beautiful women brings us all to the same conclusion: they’re no better or worse than any other women. Some are awesome. A lot are fucked up and not worth the effort. No level of beauty will change that. That being said, I’m greedy. I want it all. If I were to settle down again, I’d find it hard to do with an okay looking woman who was awesome in every other respect. That’s just me though.

 

 

 

Last chick I was with was fine as hell but FUCKED in the head. I had a young tender before that who wasn’t as fine, but turned me on…too bad she was just dumb.

Enter my current love though — Sexy as hell AND smart as fuck? I knew I had to keep her. I spilled my innermost secrets upfront cause I could NOT risk loosing this one.

 

 

Dimes suffer from Princess Syndrome. FUCK all of the fucks out of that LOL. It ain’t worth it.. yeah they cute, but they are lame in bed, don’t sweat you, don’t make you feel wanted n shit. So you make a decision… I’d rather go for a cute sexy chick with everything else I need vs one that just looks beautiful.

 

 

 

I used to chase and chase all kinds of stupid foxes, but then my wife came in and smashed my prototype thoughts of what I thought I wanted in a woman… threw in my player cards, tossed out the roster and deleted text messages (not the pics) and went franchise. So, if you can find a princess and make it work… more power, but how she is when you meet her is how she is gonna be throughout… can’t change that.

 

 

One thing I noticed over the years of dating is that  all the true dime chicks had absolutely nothing to bring to the table but looks and occasionally skills in the bedroom. My theory is that women like that never develop any ancillary skills because they don’t have to.  Men give them everything in the first place to get close to them all they have to do is show up.

 

 

 

I think this pretty much sums up my experiences and feelings on this topic:

Here’s what I’m thinking though — how would women react if they were told the truth about this dime vs. basic chick theory. I would suspect that the mature and logical ones would still be pissly about us even thinking that they were not as hot as the dimes, even though they got the prize that the dime could never get. The prize being a committed mate.

 

 

To me, the only dime piece status chicks that are worth it are the ones with ugly ducking syndrome or that were tomboys growing up.  Ain’t nothing worse that a chick that thinks all she has to do is show up and look pretty — well besides the chick that ain’t all that but thinks she is lol. I ain’t winning no modeling contests either so I ain’t one to sit up and get rid of a decent chick because I think i could get a finer one…heck, she could do the same to me.

 

 

Next time yaw out at the grocery store look in a Dime chicks basket… bunch of Hungry Mans and top ramens and shyt, Bytch who you feeding with that?  But these hoe ass niggas out here today accept that shyt merely cause she got some good pussy.  Shyt my wife cooked for me ONCE and it was over.  I’ve had my fair share of broads and she was the only one to throw down in the kitchen. Ask most hoes if they cook period let alone separate dishes and see what you get…

 

 

But that’s just our opinion. What do you think?

Got a situation?  Need a man’s opinion?
Email us at ohellnawl@gmail.com
Subject: Roundtable

Hex
Hex is about as wrong as two left feet and there is nothing right about him. Every time we yell at Hex, his rebuttal is always that we are doing so simply because he is Black....yeah..think about that.
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Latest posts by Hex (see all)

  • TroyPowers

    "Gimme a fat slut that cooks and does dishes." -Eminem

  • yaya120

    whats a regular intelligent girl to do?

    • BrownRiceBoiy

      don't waste your time with a dude looking for a blow up doll???…and you're "regular"?…oh okay~side eye~…

      =)

      • yaya120

        very regular.

    • bsmuv

      From the postings read, sounds like all you need to do is sit tight and maintain your skills set. The right guy will come to his senses when he meets you.

  • BrownRiceBoiy

    so is that a straight dime issue?…i only ask bc i've dated women who have been considered "dimes"…hell my ex wife and ex gf's was referred to as a "quarter" "head turner" heart breaker" blah blah…and very smart, super pretty, a total goofballs, can fix a car, but not nan one of them could cook worth a shyt!…lmao

    but the one thing they ALL would say is that they would get embarrassed about how they looked!…
    my ex wife and current gf in particular got to a point where they would dress down and try to look sloppy…oddly i know a lot of "too pretty to be gay" chicks who do that and seem to try harder in their relationships bc they dont want the "dumb pretty" chick label put on her…

    but dang thats what dudes go thru with dimes???…yowza…

    • ToodySaysHey

      beauty aint all its cracked up to be.

      shyt can be lonely…IJS.

      • BrownRiceBoiy

        a lot of my single "pretty" buddies agree…seems they dont get chased much bc people have their minds made up about them soon as they look at them…

    • cakes_and_pies

      One of my lesbian friends dated a girl who was gorgeous, but she couldn't boil a hot dog, stayed in the salon and in the clubs, was dumb as a box of hot rocks, and stole from people. She knew she was no good, but she looked good. hey stayed together for a couple years.

      • BrownRiceBoiy

        i've yet to meet a pretty lesbian who can cook…and i know hundreds of em lmao…

        • Zuly

          I'm relatively attractive and I can cook up a storm….but I'm bisexual. Does that count? LOL.

  • hautie

    Sadly, I would like to confirm the thing about stunningly beautiful girls. They do expect you to pay for their time.

    They have been told early on from their Mothers… and practically everyone in the media… get the cash while you can. And they rarely develop a decent personality. Or a conscience.

    But never forget… you are not buying to own it. Cause they are not selling it. But they will lease it out to you for a price.

    And the last thing you want… is a girl who believes it take a lot of cash to have their attention. Run. Before you are broke.

    But unfortunately nearly all those girls, never realize they have a expiration date on them. And get down right nasty, when it finally dawns on them, they are 5 years past their expiration date. And keep on hitting up the bars… looking for their next victim.
    ~~

    Now what is it about food and men? Seriously.

    I do find it amusing that cooking does seem to be a quality, that will keep a man's attention. My boyfriend told me early on… that he was never ever leaving me… because I knew how to fry-up, chicken fried steak.

    Then he nearly lost his mind, the first time he saw those home made hot yeast rolls coming out of the oven.

    I do love my simple man. Who can be controlled with my fine cooking. :)

    • cakes_and_pies

      Having a woman who makes (good) Homemade food is like opening that box with the Nintendo in it for Christmas.

      • Bubba Renaldo Garcia

        You got that right. In a lot of cases, cooking wins over looks

        • retired_heathen

          Chu'ch and tabanackle!

    • bsmuv

      Mane fugg all a that, cooking trumps looks any day of the week ending in Y. Hell why in dah fugg do you think God invented doggy style and light switches with dimmers?

  • TroyPowers

    Seriously, I've found that if you tell a woman what you expect early on, she'll either get right or get gone. If on the first date you tell her, "Hey, I've dated all the beautiful women in the world. My mother is beautiful. My sister is beautiful. Some of my best female friends are runway and print models. Simply being beautiful doesn't impress me. You wanna impress me, be able to cook a decent meal, comfort a crying child, and balance a fucking checkbook." That'll weed out the beautiful duds right away.
    One of my first dates is always to have a chick over while I cook for her. That'll tell you all you need to know. If she doesn't take the initiative at some point and either a) help prepare the meal, or b) clean up during/after meal preparation, she fails.

    • melette

      I find it impressive that a woman will come to your house after a few dates. I don't do that. *not trying to die* You must look really trustworthy.

  • ToodySaysHey

    I dunno. I really dont.

    First of all, Phuck the guy that said all pretty women suffer from princess syndrome. Phuck you and everything about you.

    If anything, pretty women suffer from "tired of dudes with no job and nothing to offer trying to holler because just because they want it, they think they should have it"

    That said, Ill say this…my mother is and was a very very good looking woman. Made it kind of hard as a kid cuz you go to PTA meetings and your friends and their dads are lusting after your mother, lol.

    But any troubles she may have had with men had to do with one thing and one thing only….she crazy like that glue, and not because of some kind of "princess" syndrome. If anything, I always used to wonder why she dated so many fugly men. Maybe she did it cuz she figured fugly men would be more "grateful" and "indebted" to her for dating them, I dont know. But man…she went out with some dudes that could have worked as extras on the LOTR set. Just saying.

    • http://uepa.wordpress.com/ uepa

      ^THIS right here

      but

      "some dudes that could have worked as extras on the LOTR set"

      ****DEAD!*****

    • BrownRiceBoiy

      eww i feel you on the having a good looking mom thing…to this day i still get friends making remarks and my skin bristles!…never do i want to know what nasty ish is running thru your head when you looking at my mom or the other uber girly chicks in my family!…

      im feel pretty lucky to look like my good looking dad…lol its a plus with my "orientation" but it does bring on odd issues in itself…

  • ToodySaysHey

    I mean wtf…if you;re ugly, men complain

    if your too beautiful its an issue.

    tha phuck y'all men want? lol.

    most really pretty women just wanted to be treated like a damn human being
    and not some object on a pedastal or something to be conquered.

    how about you approach pretty women like a human and leave it at that.

    and honestly? when you are really in love with somebody, after a while you dont even really
    "see" their looks. You are still attracted to them because you are in love with who they are but it goes beyond the physical.

    at least thats how I felt about one of my ex bfs and that man was absolutely beautiful, to me anyway.

    • Fadematic

      To answer your question, salty ice cream and pizza. Maybe the new Spider-Man movie.

      Then again that's just me speaking as my own brand of man.

  • ToodySaysHey

    Second of all…all the dudes complaining about the drama of a pretty woman, let me posit my theory.

    You didnt *bother* to learn about that woman.

    By that I mean, if that woman had been average/above average..you would have taken the time to see if you had anything in common to make it worth your while to pursue. You would have known if you have common interests, desires, fetishes, if she liked comic books, etc.

    but no, all you saw was her exterior and then by the time the allure of that ran out *then* you realized that she had a stank attitude, or was dumb as bricks, or couldnt cook or whatever. So you respond to the physical and the physical only and then have the nerve to be shocked when the other things that matter in the relationship arent up to par when you werent concerned about learning those things about that woman off top to begin with.

    Just saying..

    • http://ohhellnawlblog.com minesreal

      amen!

  • The Lurkasaurus Rex

    First off, there are a number of studies like this one (sorry, abstract only) that question the myth of a "standard" of physical beauty.

    Most of them suggest that most women are attractive because their features fall within average proportions for a woman's face (for example), and that these proportions suggest both overall health and mating ability to men.

    There are some outliers, but they are the exception, not the rule. Gina Gershon's lips, for example, seem like prime wet dream material to some men, but those same lips would look like The Joker's mouth on Rihanna.

    Then there is the fact that some women are simply better dressed/prepared than others. Consider the following picture:

    <img src="http://www.eonline.com/eol_images/Entire_Site/2012430/reg_1024.katy.mkup.mh.053012.jpg&quot; alt="Katy_Perry,_Made_Up_and_DAYum">

    In the first pic, she looks like the pop princess she is. In the second, she looks like the girl that sat next to you in English comp, wearing baggy sweats to class and looking like she needs to lay off the cheeseburgers.

    Yes, I'm only talking about faces right now, but it's hard to find a woman whose body is so bangin' that her face can be straight ignored…and, when one considers what dropping a couple of pounds and working out can do (see Rebecca Meyer, 2009 Biggest Loser Contestant), well, those facial averages start to fall right back into the norms that we consider attractive.

    <img src="http://ewpopwatch.files.wordpress.com/2009/11/meyer.jpg&quot; alt="Could_Get_It._RAT_NAH">

    So, yeah, count me as someone that believes physical beauty is a bit of a myth.

    • ToodySaysHey

      "So, yeah, count me as someone that believes physical beauty is a bit of a myth. "

      uh huh

      this couple and the billion dollar make up, plastic surgery and fitness industries beg to differ….

      <img src=https://encrypted-tbn1.gstatic.com/images?q=tbn:ANd9GcRJnsgCPz4DK7soAJEmE7BOtnS2359RgSF_kuW5PiwBjM-B-nHvrw>

      • Leo_YardieChick

        And those two lasted how long?

        • ToodySaysHey

          I didnt say being pretty leads to everlasting love.

          All Im saying is , physical beauty aint no myth.

  • http://ohnblog.com/newohnblog/ Beffa

    reads this and well umm wow don't know what to say

    will never have pretty girl syndrome cause I'm not pretty and well umm shoot I don't even know what to say to this…

    strange

    • Leo_YardieChick

      Same here. Most days, I still feel like an Ugly Duckling, and get suspicious when a guy says he finds me attractive. Low self-esteem is a bitch.

  • Zuly

    "Shyt my wife cooked for me ONCE and it was over."

    That made me LOL. I really think T would never leave me solely because of my cooking. Haha. One time she asked me if I would ever get tired of cooking, and when I said no she said, "Good because that would be devastating to me."

    As a side note, I LOVE that one of you used the word "ancillary" in regular conversation.