It’s that time of year when all your plans of losing 20lbs for summer are ruined, sodomised and dashed for a good few two weeks as you consume copious amounts of the confectionery effary that is the awesomeness known as Girl Scout cookies.
Now i’m not saying that Girl Scout cookies are the greatest thing ever, but what I’m saying is that CLEARLY better shyt just simply hasn’t be created and or discovered. There is nothing that GS cookies can’t make better in your life, heffa. Nothing!! No matter what you are doing and no matter how amazing it is, a gatdamn Tagalong cookie in your mouth will make it THAT much better. Won the lottery? Awesome. Won the lottery AND a box of cookies, bytch what!!! WHAT!!! Doesn’t get any better, boo. Having your first threesome, fellaz, and you are elated at the site of 4 boobs? how about 4 boobs and a cookie though, dude? Yeahhhhh you feel me.
How good are Girl Scout cookies? I
myself know people who have scheduled dates with a cookie before. I mean make time..clear the schedule…and just…. spend some tiiiime with a whole gatdamn BOX!!!
Isn’t that awful!?? Oh the f**k well, son.
When you get a box of GS cookies in your lap, s**t just got real.