Dear White people.
Tomorrow is the 4th of July and mayhaps you have been invited to a cook-out or two. If you are really a special person of little melanin, you may have been invited to a “black friend’s” cookout if you’re lucky. Now before you start celebrating the fact that you are officially a “cool-ass white person” that black people love, you need to know just how Black this friend of yours is.
I’m going to give a litmus test in which to gauge the level of their blackness.
If you go to a “Black friend’s” cookout, and they don’t play at least 10-15 of the songs on this playlist, your friend is not really all that black. They probably make fried chicken with cornflakes rather than flour….or they don’t eat fried chicken at all. Yeah.. one of THOSE types.
These friends had better play at least one Earth Wind and Fire, Frankie Beverly and Maze,Stevie Wonder, Gap Band or any other song that somehow and someway has Charlie Wilson in it or early Michael Jackson. And if every time one of these songs come on they don’t stop in mid conversation and say: “Ohhhhhh this is my sonnnng” or ” Ohhh shit” those Blacks folks aren’t Black. They might be African American…but they aren’t black.
ol faking ass fake negroes.
Hell if you want to impress the shyt out of some Black friends who are coming to your cookout, play one of these songs…. matter of fact play THIS song…
You play that song and YOU will be welcomed into the pantheon of Blackness.
Not only does every single Black person ever born or ever will be born love this song…. we all know how to play it on the Bass. even if we have never touched a Bass even if we can’t play any other song on any instrument. Bytch we know how to play this one. Put a Bass in your Black friend’s hand and see if they don’t just bust out with: Doon-doon-doon-doooooondoon-doon. 5 black folks read that right there and started dancing in their seat, bytch. I’m not even lying….
I don’t care if you are broke or the President of the Secret Society of Bourgeois negroes…. you KNOW the song: Before I let go.
Jussaying… that song is the shyt.
Have a great 4th of July, hookers!